Getting Little (Chapters)

Three days of guilt were too much. For three days Sarita had wallowed in every distraction she could use to keep from thinking about her fight with Nohemi. She’d been a robot at work, and Britt hadn’t cared. Sarita found her manager’s behavior odd, but didn’t bother investigating it.

The only thing that mattered was fixing the hole in her heart, so Sarita was knocking on the door that held the solution to her problem. Impatiently waiting in the hallway as the light turned gold in the windows, Sarita knocked again.

Astra opened the door after the second round of knocking, looking at Sarita in surprise. “Princess! Come in. You look terrible, what’s wrong?”

“I’m a bad baby.” Sarita whimpered, lurching into her Angel for a hug.

“You’re a little naughty sometimes, but you’re my precious Princess. What’s going on?”

“I had a fight with Mimi. I said awful things to her.”

“Oh, sweetheart. I know you two are close.” Astra squeezed Sarita tightly. “Did this just happen tonight?”

“No, it was a few days ago.” Sarita sniffled. “I don’t know how to apologize, I can’t do it. Plus, she should apologize too!”

“Did she say nasty things to you too?”

“Unfair stuff.”

“Sweetie, you’re so upset, it breaks my heart. But you came to the right place. You came to your Angel. I’ll take care of everything.”

“Yes please. Please Angel, make it better.”

“You know you have to get a punishment for being mean to your friend, right Princess?”

Sarita nodded emphatically. This is what I came for, she realized. If she was Angel’s baby girl, if she could get punishment for being bad, then everything would be over and fixed. It’d be like going to confession, but without the creepy vibes.

Astra took Sarita’s bag and coat before leading her to the bathroom. Sarita winced to see her Angel lathering up a bar of soap, but obediently opened her mouth all the same. The taste was worse than she remembered from being a kid, especially when Astra pushed Sarita’s mouth closed until her teeth bit into the bar. As the awful burning chemical taste spread across her tongue, Sarita wept.

The tears that poured down Sarita’s cheeks drew the poisonous guilt out of her and handed it to Astra. Babies don’t have to fix things, they’re not responsible. Horrible though the soap in her mouth was, it didn’t feel like enough. Sarita watched the egg-timer Astra had put on the bathroom counter and tried squeezing her bladder.

Nothing happened. So much for my diaper training. Sarita snorted, regretting it instantly as a bit of soap went down her throat, making her gag. It occurred to her that the phrase “diaper training” might contain a solution. She bunched her jeans up around her waist until they felt bulky and awkward. A few moments of pretending to be diapered had her pants soaked.

The timer went off and Astra returned to the bathroom from whatever she’d been prepping. She stared at Sarita, wide eyed, until the timer beeped a second time. “Baby girl! You know you’re not supposed to potty in your pants. Do you realize this means that you’re going to lose all your privileges?”

Sarita nodded tearfully. Perfect. No privileges meant no decisions. Even as she gagged over the sink, while Astra rinsed her mouth out, she was feeling better. For having an “accident”, Astra stripped Sarita and hosed her down with the shower attachment. Standing spread-legged in the tub while cold water shot up into her privates brought more tears, but also absolution.

Punishments gave way to comfort when Sarita’s Angel wrapped her in a warm towel and put her on a changing blanket in the bedroom. Between rounds of lotion, powder, and padding, Astra caressed Sarita’s body. All the while she was diapering Sarita, Angel told Sarita to be a good baby. The litany those commands made had Sarita in a comfortable foggy headspace. Most importantly, concerns about anyone but her Angel were far away.

After the diaper came footie pajamas with a hood. Sarita luxuriated in the softness of the pajama’s microfibers so much, that she hardly noticed when her Angel put mittens on her. They were more like hand-bags, in truth. A single cloth container reduced her hands to paddles and secured with a Velcro strap at the wrist.

“You’ve lost your potty privileges, and I’m not going to let you talk much, because you’ve been bad with both those things.” Astra snuggled up to Sarita on the bed. “That means no asking for a change. I’ll check your diapers and change you when you need it.”

“Okay.” Sarita nuzzled Astra, her eyes half-lidded.

“If you’re a good baby you can have treats tomorrow, but until then, you’re on baby foods. The last thing I need from you before I baby you completely is to ask about Nero and your work schedule.”

“Nero has food and water, but he needs to see somebody at least once a day. Unless my schedule changes, I have three days off.”

“What’s your phone password?” Astra asked, snagging Sarita’s phone from the bedside table. “If your manager texts you, I’ll tell her you’re too sick to talk and that I’m taking care of you.”

“It’s soltera, no upper case or symbols or anything.”

Astra unlocked the phone and touched a couple of buttons. Sarita couldn’t see what her Angel was snooping through and didn’t much care. She took the time to wiggle her butt and test the fit of her diaper. It fits perfect – just like my Angel.

“Got it. Time to be my pretty potty Princess.” Astra smiled and popped a pacifier in Sarita’s mouth, clipping the ribbon to Sarita’s pajamas. In an unbothered, baby-daze, Sarita crawled behind her Angel to the living room couch. Laying her head in her Angel’s lap, Sarita curled up cutely. Her reward was a radiant smile from Astra and getting her hair pet. Spending a few days of being cute in exchange for affection was going to be amazing.

“I wish I could keep you like this all the time. Tomorrow we’ll go over to your apartment and you can be my baby there, so Nero doesn’t get lonely. It’d be so much easier if we lived together, though. What do you think about that, Princess?”

I think it’s too fast to get out the U-Haul – but half my clothes are the lesbian uniform, so who am I to judge? The safest response seemed to be a shrug, happily, Astra’s smile didn’t waver.

“Not sure yet? That’s okay. It’s the first time we’re talking about it. I love you so much, and I’m excited to do things I’ve never gotten to do with a baby girl before. We could clean out the spare room and put a cute little crib in there for you. I know you hate your job. My salary and bonuses are more than enough for both of us.”

Astra gazed dreamily into the distance, absently stroking Sarita’s back. “You don’t know how much I’d love to come home at lunch to give my baby girl kisses, feed her lunch, and change her. I’m sure I could arrange playdates or babysitters for some days too, so you wouldn’t be lonely.”

That is equal parts amazing and terrifying. A dreadful knot twisted its way through Sarita’s gut. Would she like to never set foot in GrrlPower again? Of course. Being totally dependent on Astra financially would be scary enough if they were married. And no one is talking about marriage. Not even Astra, even though she’s all about the L word now. I’m not ready to marry her for sure.

Sarita’s spiraling thoughts ground to a halt when she realized Astra was looking at her expectantly. Whatever words her Angel had said in the last couple of minutes had not made their way to Sarita’s brain. I really hope she didn’t propose right there. That would make this awkward.

Having a pacifier in her mouth gave Sarita the option of simply staring at Astra adoringly, while she sucked cutely on the nipple. Astra took Sarita’s head in her hands and kissed her forehead tenderly. It worked! Desperately, Sarita hoped they were at the end of intense future-planning conversations. I’m trying to get my baby-on, over here!

Teasing fingers popped the buttons along Sarita’s pajama front. Astra’s hand slipped under the fabric and lightly traced under Sarita’s breasts. She arched her back, moaning when Astra’s hands found and caressed the softness of her chest. Before the sexy caresses had properly begun, Astra buttoned Sarita’s front up. The only response to Sarita’s whines was a pat on the cheek and a hug.

If Astra was trying to make Sarita extra cuddly by turning her on, her plan was a resounding success. Finally free of relationship angst and overwhelming future plans, Sarita felt herself slip deep into Littlespace. She was so happy to be a squirmy, snuggly baby that she didn’t notice anything else. It took a bit of sag in her diaper to realize that she’d been wetting as soon as she needed to go without thinking about it.

Asking for a change was against the rules, but Sarita decided that wasn’t the same thing as pointing out that her diaper was wet. Muddled whines from behind her pacifier and pawing at her crotch got Astra’s attention. As with everything else that evening, Astra diaper-checked Sarita in a way that made her feel as helpless as possible.

Instead merely getting a few fingers inside her diaper, Sarita found herself laid on her back with her feet pulled up in the air. Astra unsnapped Sarita’s pajamas along the crotch and down her thighs, exposing her sagging padding. As Sarita blushed, Astra squished the padding against the Little girl’s crotch until cool liquid seeped out against her sex.

“This diaper can hold plenty more. It’s not unusual for a baby girl like you to be in a wet diaper. You need to learn to be wet for a while and not get changed right away.” Astra grinned, squishing the diaper more rhythmically against Sarita’s crotch, while she used her free hand to stroke Sarita’s belly. “That doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it, though.”

In no time, Sarita was working her hips against Astra’s hand in time with her Angel’s squeezes. Astra’s hand roaming over her body had Sarita in a fine lather. Maddeningly, Astra left her squirmy baby on the couch to go to the kitchen. Sarita followed on her hands and knees, nuzzling Astra’s legs in a fine imitation of Nero.

A warm bottle of milk would ordinarily be a hard sell, but in that moment it represented more attention from her Angel. Sarita slurped greedily at the bottle while Astra petted her breasts. With Sarita overheating in her pajamas, Astra stripped her baby girl down and sat her at the table. Baby-food might as well have been carne asada, since every spoonful Astra fed Sarita came with a caress.

Getting a diaper change would mean being touched under her diaper, so a full bladder was Sarita’s enemy. She wet every time she could, even trying to wet when she couldn’t feel anything at all. As her diaper filled, her Angel had more and more praise for her, though Sarita’s only reward was more edging.

As the city was going to sleep, after Sarita had polished off a third bottle, her diaper was well and truly wrecked. Despite that, Sarita got her teeth brushed and her face washed before Astra put her on the changing blanket. At least, her diaper came off with a sensation of pure bliss. Her pacifier ceased to matter, Sarita’s vocalizations had been reduced to horny whimpers.

Each swipe of the wipes sent Sarita trembling. The silken touch of lotion on her skin had her drooling. It was at the lotion stage that Sarita’s diaper change ground to a halt, with Astra’s slick hand rubbing mind-bending circles on the Little girl’s sex.

Presented with Astra’s bare breast, Sarita sucked eagerly on her Angel’s nipple. The stuff Astra was using on her nipples was cloyingly sweet, it took Sarita a few minutes to realize she was licking condensed milk off her Angel. Odd as that was, it had the advantage of not being as runny, letting Sarita concentrate more on the main event.

They fell into a rhythm of Astra dribbling syrupy milk onto her breasts for Sarita’s diligent tongue, while Astra petted Sarita between her legs. Angel was already moaning, unrestrained in her lust. The hotness of hearing Astra lose control had Sarita on fire. She had to desperately lick her Angel into two orgasms before the focus switched to Sarita.

Nearly in tears from the hot, pulsating heat all over her body, Sarita spasmed as soon as Astra touched her button. That was the beginning of a world where the only things in existence were her soaking kitty and Astra’s glorious fingers. Sarita thrashed and screamed her way into a sweaty mess, until her throat and pussy were both sore.

In the trembling denouement  that followed, Astra’s bedside light was far too loud. Infinitely tender touches sponged Sarita clean and dried her off. Swaddled in a diaper and her Angel’s arms, Sarita was out like a light.

—–

Two more days of taking a break from – well – everything had Sarita at peace. She thought she’d be refreshed, but there was dread in her heart when Astra put her in a final diaper and patted her on the cheek.

“Everything is squeaky clean in your apartment, Nero is all set up, and you’ve got some diapers and pullups in case you want to wear them in the next couple of days. There’s leftovers in the fridge so you won’t have to cook. How’s my Princess?”

“I don’t want you to go.” Sarita eyes darted over her pristine apartment. Far from being relaxing, it looked to her like a lot of beautiful clean spaces that she’d never be able to maintain on her own.

“Oh sweetheart, I don’t want to go either, but work won’t wait.” Astra pulled Sarita in for a tender kiss. “Think about that crib. It’s a real offer. I know big commitments are scary, if I’m being honest, it makes me a little nervous too. I think we can make it work.”

“I love you!” Sarita grabbed Astra, searching for anything she could say or do that would keep her Angel around. All she was able to wring out of Astra was a tearful kiss and an “I love you too.”

Then Astra was gone, leaving behind a mountain of responsibilities and consequences that teetered over Sarita, ready for an avalanche. Flipping through her phone, she glared sourly at Nohemi’s conversation. Mimi hadn’t sent any texts. I didn’t either – and I yelled first.

That kind of thinking lead to bad, uncomfortable places. Sarita skipped the texts and went straight to calling Pauline. “Hi Pauline! I have the day off tomorrow and I was thinking about you.”

“H-hi Sarita. I was thinking about you too.” Pauline’s tone had dipped concerningly when she answered but recovered fast. Sarita hoped it was just surprise at being called instead of texted. Or how strong I came on. Doesn’t matter, I just need to get her here.

“I’m wearing a diaper. You should put one on and come over.”

“Oh – yeah?” Pauline giggled nervously. “What’ll happen if I do?”

“We’ll get wet, in a couple of ways.”

“I uh – Sarita, is this only a booty call?”

“No! I miss you. I was hoping you’d stay over – with or without doing – stuff.”

“Stuff huh?”

“I want you – I want to make love to you. But I want to hang out and cuddle with you even more.”

A sigh of relief came over the phone. “I want that too. I’ll be right over.”

“Love you.” Sarita hung up before Pauline could answer, nearly dropping her phone out of her trembling hand. Why did I say that? It’s okay, people say that by accident at the end of calls sometimes. If she’s freaked out – it was an accident.

Pauline didn’t seem freaked out when she arrived. She dove enthusiastically into Sarita’s greeting by way of a kiss and a butt-grab. Sarita would have carried that energy straight to the bedroom, but Pauline was keeping her hands still and cutting the kisses short. Reluctantly, Sarita disengaged and smiled at her – friend.

“Thanks for coming over.”

“Thanks for inviting me. Your place looks spotless. Was there a wild Astra here?”

The question sucked the wind out of Sarita. She couldn’t handle another fight like the one she’d had with Mimi, couldn’t afford to lose another friend. Desperate justifications tumbled from her lips before her brain could parse them.

“It’s not my fault – she just does stuff – you know how she is – it’s nice to have it clean anyway – please, I don’t want this to come between us…”

“Sarita! Take a breath hon.” Pauline gently bonked her forehead against Sarita’s. “It’s okay, I get it. I’ve been railroaded by a girlfriend before. It’s annoying, but kind of hot, right?”

“It is.” Sarita sighed and pulled Pauline into her arms. “If Astra is my girlfriend, you are too.”

“Y-yeah?”

“If you want to be.”

“What happens now? Do you want like, a thruple or something?”

That would fix everything. I could have Pauline and my Angel. Astra could get her sexy babygirls. Everyone would be happy – except Pauline. That question didn’t come out happy at all.

“I don’t know. Probably not? I don’t want to hurt you, I don’t want to hurt anyone. It – it hasn’t been that long dating either of you and – and…”

“I get it.” Pauline tucked her head into the crook of Sarita’s neck. “I like being your girlfriend.”

The L word Sarita had let slip on the phone was stuck between them like a briar. She held Pauline tightly, trying to squish that bit of discomfort out of existence. They migrated to the couch, lying next to each other entwined.

“Sarita – I brought stuff to stay over. I want to be with you tonight.”

“I love you.” The words came out so easily, so naturally that Sarita couldn’t make herself want to take them back. It’s true. I don’t know why, but it’s true. Something about the sentimental way Pauline looked at her soothed Sarita’s anxiety in a way that only the deepest Littlespace had been able to manage.

“You don’t have to…”

“I mean it.”

Pauline burst into tears, clinging to Sarita with every ounce of her strength. “You confusing bitch. I hate you.”

“I’m a mess, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, stupid, I love you too.”

“Really?”

“Really?” Pauline mocked, laughing as she rolled on top of Sarita. “You just said it to me twice, and you’re all surprised I love you?”

“I’m a disaster and you’re…”

Nero leapt deftly from the coffee table and landed on Pauline’s back. Both girls froze, Sarita staring incredulously at her kitty. “Nero! What are you doing? You get down right now!”

As if he hadn’t heard a word, Nero sat down and set to washing his right paw. Pauline made a sort of smirking snort, which sent Sarita into a giggle. They quaked with helpless laughter, Pauline letting out a cackle when Sarita snorted. Pauline’s heaving back accomplished what Sarita’s words had failed to do, sending Nero bounding away in irritation.

Hand in hand, they walked to the kitchen by unspoken agreements. Healthy leftovers lost instantly to chips and dip. They stole little glances at each other as they munched, hovering over the bowl hip to hip.

“What do you love about me?” Pauline asked.

“You made me feel special at the munch – and then we had fun together. I feel like we’re figuring out this kink stuff together. You’re so sweet, it breaks my heart sometimes.”

“Uh – that was a lot. I thought you’d just say my hair or my boobs or something.” Pauline blushed, tucking hair behind her ears. Sarita caught her girlfriend’s hand and kissed it.

“Tell me what you love about me.”

“You’re fearless, or brave, but either way you dive into stuff in ways I can’t. I always laugh when I’m with you. You don’t always do things right, but I can tell you’re trying hard. I see how big your heart is.”

Sarita blinked quickly to clear her suddenly blurry vision. She mumbled, “You missed your chance to say, Dat Ass. It would have been hilarious.”

“Hey.” Pauline tilted Sarita’s chin up and kissed her. It tingled like a first kiss and lifted Sarita onto her toes.

“Wow.” A deep flush blossomed in Sarita’s cheeks.

“That was a real girlfriend kiss.”

“That was a love kiss.”

“Like I said.”

Sarita pressed herself gently against Pauline, breathing in the soft scent of her girlfriend’s skin. Underneath the floral deodorant and sea-salt soap was a smell that simply said “happy” in Sarita’s brain. “Now who’s confusing?”

“I hope it’s me. Confusing is a step up from where I was before.” Pauline smiled wryly at Sarita’s sigh and bonked their foreheads together. “I’m sorry to keep harping on it but – knowing I’m sharing your heart with Astra makes moments like this hard.”

“I know. It’s hard for me too.” Do I love them both? My Angel is – a lot of stuff to me. She’s not just a safety net, right? There was no answer for Sarita in her heart. Astra’s rescue had been so thorough, that she couldn’t prise that feeling of relief away from how she felt about the woman. “You don’t have to stay tonight, if it’s too hard.”

“Oh no you don’t. I want that wet butt of yours in bed with me tonight.” Pauline grinned and grabbed a pair of belt loops on Sarita’s pants.

“My butt isn’t wet!”

“Why not? It should be.” Pauline swung around, pinning Sarita against the kitchen counter. “Wet your pants for me.”

“What’s all this? Since when are you all dominant?”

“Since you let your guard down I guess. Or maybe I feel more confident because I know better where we stand.” Pauline kissed Sarita suddenly, driving a little gasping moan out of her. “I’m going to check your diaper. It better be wet.”

Sarita squeaked, blushed, and emptied her bladder. Pauline had her hand under Sarita’s padding before her accident was done, shivering as her fingers were soaked. One of those fingers slid further down – and hooked back up and in. Sarita arched her back and gasped.

“It makes you hot to be embarrassed, I can tell, ‘cause I’m the same.” Pauline’s eyes were sparkling with sexy excitement. “You might be worse than me though. I thought I was the biggest diaper slut in the munch, but the trophy is yours.”

“Pauline, stop…” Sarita whined, squeezing her tunnel around Pauline’s finger.

“There’s one good thing about this whole Astra situation. I bet she left lots of diapers and changing stuff here.” Pauline grinned when Sarita meekly nodded. “I’m going to change your diaper now. You’re going to be a good girl and let me.”

That’s so hot. Walking to the bedroom with Pauline’s hand down her pants was white hot too, no matter how physically awkward it was. Laying back on the changing blanket, Sarita’s breath caught in her throat at the tentative, gentle way Pauline tore her diaper tapes.

Her girlfriend worshipped her rear and crotch with both hands before bringing wipes into play. To Sarita’s surprise, and some disappointment, Pauline went right to wrapping her in a new diaper, with no other steps.

“No powder and stuff?” Sarita asked, wiggling her hips. The fit on the diaper was nice at least.

“You’re not going to be wearing that very long.”

“No?” Sarita giggled. “Why not?”

“Because we’re going to make out until you wet, and then it’s coming off so we can make love.”

The cocky grin on Pauline’s face was adorable, more-so for the hint of uncertainty around her eyes. Knowing her girlfriend, Sarita reached under Pauline’s skirt and planted her hand on a crotch-full of soggy padding.

“You’re almost right. There’s one thing that happens first.”

“What’s that?” Pauline squirmed in Sarita’s grasp, caught by the crotch, but caught between her bravado and vulnerability as well.

“I’m going to change your diaper like you did for me.” Sarita rose and met Pauline’s lips for a trembling kiss.

As gently as she could, Sarita laid Pauline on the changing blanket. Delicately, she pried open the tapes. It was a simple medical diaper, sagging off Pauline’s curves. It’s still sexy. I really am a diaper girl now.

Sarita peeled Pauline’s diaper open and pushed her girlfriend’s legs apart. As she stroked Pauline’s wet, twitching skin, a memory from the Green Fairy tickled her mind. Why not? Leaning forward, Sarita licked slowly across Pauline’s slit. The taste wasn’t as bad as she’d feared. Salty and kind of bitter-sour. Not that strong. Way to be hydrated, babe.

“Oh god!” Pauline arched her hips and quivered.

“Is that something you like?” Sarita asked, teasingly.

“I almost came. You knew what that was going to do to me. Uhhh – fuck you.”

“Not yet babe.” Sarita pounced on the bed, straddling Pauline. “Not until you wet again, remember?”

“We both have to wet?”

“That’s right.”

“I’m going to drink a gallon of water.”

Sarita giggled and kissed Pauline on the cheek. Returning to the diaper change on hold, she caressed her girlfriend’s body with wipes. Pauline’s little moans at every touch were a delight. She taped a new diaper on Pauline, skipping the extras.

“Now the make outs?” Pauline’s voice was so plaintive and cute that Sarita had no choice but to jump on her.

They took their time, beginning with slow kisses that burned low, but hot. The coals those kisses ignited were fed by breezy touches along their skin, punctuated by frantic removal of whatever clothes were in the way of their touches’ trajectory.

The twin infernos in their bodies had them writhing together on slick sweat, panting between kisses. Nothing separated them, but some rumpled padding around their waists. Sarita was the first to wet her diaper, stoking their fires even higher. With some minutes of straining and a hilarious grunt, Pauline joined Sarita with a soggy diaper.

As rudely as they’d stripped their clothes, they tore their diapers off each other. Sexy wet on taboo wet on sweaty wet drove Sarita into a frenzy. Pauline shrieked in lust when Sarita bit her shoulder and plunged a trio of fingers into her lover. Stretched into uncomfortable delight, Sarita ground her thigh into Pauline’s cleft.

A beautiful arc of pleasure drew taut across their nerves until they cried out together and collapsed. It seemed impossible to pull away from Pauline. Sarita sucked in great lungfuls of her lover’s breath while they cuddled cheek to cheek.

“Do I have you all day tomorrow?” Sarita managed, curving an arm around the small of Pauline’s back.

“I wish. We have the morning though. Evening too, if you want me to come back after work.”

“I want.”

“I love you.”

“I love you.”

This feels so good, but I don’t know if it feels safe. Maybe it would if I didn’t have Astra. Does she feel safe? She feels – strong. Ugh, I wish someone would choose for me. As strong as Sarita’s angst was, it couldn’t overcome the sheer comfort of afterglow in Pauline’s arms. She let troublesome thoughts fade away and cradled her new love in her arms.