What did one wear to a playdate with a new Little friend and maybe-girlfriend, who’s family had once hired Ava as a house sitter for far too much money? If there was a right answer to that question, Ava hadn’t figured it out. With input from Oliver, she’d gone with a shirt who’s sleeves and trim were bright pink, with a flamingo printed on the white front. There was no padding under her jeans – something Ava considered a bit of a test. Intrigued, Oliver had asked her who the test was for. Ava hadn’t had an answer for that either, much to her friend’s amusement.
To no one’s surprise, Ava’s knock on Briana’s door was met by the fiery Little squealing in delight as she threw the door open. Briana was in her trademark Rainbow Brite meets Punky Brewster fusion style. Though there was no tutu involved in the outfit, surprisingly, Briana was wearing hotpants, tights, and socks, all in different colors. Her white shirt embroidered with the word Princess in pink was a little on the nose – but then again, Briana seemed to live on the nose.
The house itself was much more Briana’s Mom’s style, a creaky old faux-Victorian that Ava was instantly amused by. I get it, Rasmussens, you like old stuff. While it certainly looked cozy and well cared for, it also looked like a place in which Ava would need to maneuver carefully.
“Hi Briana.”
“Ava! Come in, ohmygosh come in!” Briana bounced in frustrated hyperactivity. Her desire to bodily yank Ava through the doorway was graven on every inch of her being.
It was super sweet that Briana kept her hands to herself, letting Ava navigate her crutches over the unfamiliar threshold. Equally sweet was the way that Briana threw herself on Ava for a hug as soon as the Indian girl was inside and stable. She’s figuring it out fast. Ava thought happily. Putting her trust in Briana, Ava leaned into the hug until the snuggly girl was her support. The front room of the house looked like it took up most of the building, with a vaulted ceiling at second story height and furniture used to outline separate living and dining areas. Though welcoming, the house’s décor had a definite vibe of big people stuff that kids shouldn’t touch.
Over Briana’s shoulder – or her head, really – Ava blushed to see that they had an audience. The Little girl’s mom and her aunt Rosa were sitting in the living room with fond expressions on their faces. She felt an extra burn in her cheek when Veronica met her gaze. This is so awkward – I can’t believe I let her change my diaper. Ava’s eyes slid off Veronica’s usual black outfit to the orange, black, and pink athleticwear Rosa was wearing.
It’d been a while since Ava had seen anyone so aggressively gay, outside of a Pride parade. Her usual instinct to toss a bit of snark Rosa’s way was thwarted by the mood that had been building since she’d donned a Little outfit. With a soft cough, Ava nodded to the two women. “Hi Ms. Rasmussen and um – Ms. um – uh…”
“You can just call me Rosa.” Rosa laughed. “And you should probably call this one Veronica.”
“Sorry, I wasn’t thinking, it’s just that this is supposed to be a playdate and um…” Ava’s spiral into an embarrassment singularity was cut short by a reassuring squeeze from Briana.
“She can call Mom whatever she wants, right Mom? Ava’s feeling Little right now, you have to be nice to her.” Briana turned around and stamped her foot, while keeping a firm grip on Ava’s waist.
“Ms. Rasmussen is fine, or even ‘Briana’s Mom’ if you’re feeling especially Little.” Veronica smiled softly.
“You can call me Tia Rosa then if you want to be formal.” Rosa shrugged. “I’m not up for being Ms. Anybody.”
“Okay – Tia Rosa.” Ava squirmed awkwardly. Far from pushing her out of the Little mood she’d built up on the drive over, the discomfort felt like it put her perfectly in her place. Her introduction to the household was every bit as clumsy as meeting friend’s families had been as a kid.
“Who’s this friend?” Briana interrupted, grabbing the paw of the stuffed bear Ava was carrying under her arm to shake.
“This is Brownie.” Ava’s smile was wobbly, her eyes sought Veronica and Rosa’s faces for any sign that they would make fun of her. “He’s been my friend since – forever.”
To Ava’s relief, there was no hint of teasing in Rosa or Veronica’s expressions, not even good-naturedly. Veronica’s voice was quiet serious when she said, “In that case, you have more introductions to do, Briana. Brownie needs to meet Alanna right away.”
“I’m on it!” Briana stepped away from Ava – hesitated a moment with her hand still on the other girl – and was gone, blitzing across the house like a cartoon character.
“Please treat this house like your own,” Veronica said. “At the same time, if you feel you need to ask for something, please do. We’ve got plenty of snacks and drinks set up for your playdate with Briana.”
“Thanks.” Ava didn’t have time to say more before Briana stumbled to a stop in front of her.
“This is Alanna!” Briana held the stuffed lioness up to Brownie, Ava helped her bear shake hands with Alanna.
“Brownie is very pleased to meet her.”
“Alanna is honored to have Brownie as a guest.” Bouncing on her tiptoes, Briana asked, “Can I show you the house?”
“Sure, I’d love a tour.” Ava tucked Brownie back under her arm, bracing herself on her crutches properly.
“We have everything set up in the drawing room – you don’t have to see my room if you don’t want to, really.” Briana nodded toward a set of stairs that shot steeply up a wall to a hallway balcony. “It’s upstairs.”
In addition to being steep, the stairs were narrow, and their steps were worn with decades of use. The whole thing made Ava’s stomach flop. She nodded quickly to Briana. “I’d like to stay on one level if that’s okay.”
“Of course it is, there’s plenty to see down here!” Briana gave a running commentary as she ran her little legs from room to room. “This is the kitchen, we have so many snacks! Here’s the bathroom – you can ask if you need help. This is Melody’s room, we’re not supposed to disturb them because they’re working.”
That last observation was accompanied by Briana turning to face Ava and rolling her eyes so far back that she went into a backbend. Ava giggled, “But it’s the weekend.”
“I know! My dumb sib gets permission to be a Mid and now they think they have to do grown-up stuff all the time.” Briana winked. “I bet we can lure them out with cookies later.”
“I’ll help.” Ava followed Briana into the last room on the tour, unsurprised to be greeted by the juxtaposition of expensive leather furniture, and colorful blankets on the floor. What was a surprise, was the dark wood changing table in a corner. It clearly belonged in the room as much as the rest of the furniture.
“You have your changing table out all the time?”
“Mom and Dad got tired of taking me upstairs every time, or changing me on the floor.” Briana tilted her head in a curious expression. “Is it okay if I ask why you’re not wearing now – was it because you had an accident at my party?”
Ava took a seat on the well worn arm of a leather couch. Briana might have learned to be more careful with her physically – but she’d asked if it was okay to ask something embarrassing and named that thing in the same breath. This is what I get for putting on an outfit that makes it obvious I’m not wearing – and setting up a test that I don’t even know what it’s for.
“I know it’s lame to answer a question with a question but – is it okay if I don’t wear diapers around you?”
“Oh, totally!” Briana’s smile was unexpectedly unclouded, especially after the fuss Briana had kicked up about diapers at her party. “If you just didn’t feel like it, that’s fine! Come on, we have so many stuffies to introduce Brownie to.”
Lowering herself onto the soft blankets, Ava was left feeling a little foolish. She wasn’t sure what level of pushback she’d expected from Briana, but it certainly wasn’t zero. Regret wormed it’s way into her belly as she introduced Brownie to each of Briana’s stuffies in turn. There seemed to be A-List and B-List stuffies, with Briana focusing the most on the introductions of a teddy bear, giraffe and a bat. The Little girl’s face took on a serious, almost resigned expression as she picked up a pangolin stuffie.
“This is Arnold the Pangolin.” Briana helped the stuffie bow. “Arnold the Pangolin says that Arnold the Pangolin is very pleased to meet Brownie.”
Amusement teased at the corners of Ava’s mouth. “Does Arnold the Pangolin not want Arnold the Pangolin’s name shortened? Shall we refer to Arnold the Pangolin as Arnold the Pangolin – in full – every time?”
“You get it!” Briana giggled. “Arnold the Pangolin is grateful that you understood Arnold the Pangolin right away.”
Giggles bubbled out of Ava, she nodded her head to Arnold the Pangolin. “I’m always happy to refer to people the way they want.”
“Alanna would like to know if Brownie is interested in joining the Roundtable.” Briana set the formal pangolin aside, bringing her lioness back to center stage.
“Like Camelot?”
“Kind of – it’s the Round Table of Cloudland.”
“I think you mentioned that once before – is it from a book?”
“No, it’s my special Little place, where all my stuffies live. I’m a knight – and the Princess – but Alanna is the Knight Captain of the Round Table.”
“Doesn’t that make things complicated? Presumably the Princess can tell the Knight Captain what to do, but shouldn’t Alanna have authority over her knights?”
“Yep!” Briana grinned. “Complicated makes for good stories.”
“What do the knights do, anyway? Brownie deserves to know what he’s getting into.”
“Cloudland is a place of dreams. The knights fight off nightmares and keep Littles safe.”
“That sounds amazing, I’m in. I mean – Brownie is in.”
Briana bounced on her rear with an audible crinkle. “You can be a knight too if you want!”
“I’m not really the knightly type.” Ava self-consciously pushed her crutches a bit out of the way.
“And I am?” Briana smirked up at Ava, significantly shorter even when they were sitting. “That kind of stuff doesn’t matter in Cloudland.”
Warmth blossomed in Ava’s chest, putting a huge smile on her face. “Okay! Well – I’m not from Cloudland, I’m visiting. So maybe I’m already a knight in my realm.”
“Oh yeah? What’s your realm?” Briana leaned forward in rapt attention.
“It’s – a kingdom under the earth. The cave ceilings are so high you can’t see them, except for the shining jewels set into the rock like stars. There are lots of trees and beautiful lakes, and the air always smells like flowers.”
“I love it!” Briana helped Alanna through a formal bow. “Cloudland is super excited to receive foreign dignitaries. Ohmygosh, are you a princess?”
“I’m not saying.” Ava smiled mischievously. “But I have many shining jewels. We don’t have knights in my realm, but we have Kshatriya, which are kind of the same thing.”
“So you and Brownie are Kshatriya? Perfect!”
“Brownie is British, so he’s a knight.”
“Got it!” Briana nodded firmly. “What kind of things do the Kshatriya fight?”
“Actually…” Ava leaned down to whisper conspiratorially to Briana. “We’re in Cloudland looking for allies. A vicious, shapeshifting Rakshasi has impersonated my mother.”
“Oh no!” Briana’s eyes went wide with horror. “The Round Table will do everything they can to help!”
They had barely assembled the Round Table when Veronica came by with snacks – and to check Briana’s diaper. Regret twinged more strongly in Ava’s chest, but she pushed the feeling aside. In any case, she was sure Veronica was on her way out after pronouncing Briana “dry enough” – only to be caught off guard by the matronly goth woman crouching down next to her.
“How are you doing, Ava-bean?” Veronica gently stroked Ava’s hair. “Do you need anything?”
That nickname is corny – so why does it feel good? Ava shook her head bashfully at Veronica. “No, Ms. Rasmussen. Thanks for the cookies and tea.”
“You’re very welcome. Not just for the snacks either.” Veronica smiled. “Such a polite Little girl is welcome to come over any time.”
“Mommy, Ava is a visiting dignitary to Cloudland. We’re mobilizing the Round Table to save her from a rakshasi that’s trying to replace her mother.” Briana looked up at her mom with an expectant gaze.
“Oh dear, that sounds serious. I think I know what a rakshasa is, what’s a rakshasi?” Veronica swept out her dress and settled down on her heels, to Briana’s obvious delight.
“Same thing as a rakshasa, but female.” Ava took a bite of a cookie, excited to discover it was homemade. Veronica listened patiently to the story as Ava fleshed it out on the fly, and even served the Little girls their tea.
For all that she’d hidden her face when Veronica had changed her diaper, there had been unmistakable warmth in the way the goth woman had handled Ava. It would have been impossible for the situation not to be awkward – at least for Ava – but that discomfort had evaporated as soon as Veronica discreetly returned the Little girl to the party. With Briana’s mom tending so carefully to the two of them, Ava found herself longing to snuggle with Veronica – if not outright crawl into her lap.
Before Ava could even approximate the courage to shift closer to Veronica, Briana’s mom ruffled each Little’s hair and got back to her feet. “I need to do a few things around the house before my meeting at school. I’ll be back to check on you two before I go, though.”
“She means check my diaper.” Briana stuck her tongue out at her mom.
“I mean check up on both of you and see if there’s anything you need.” Veronica corrected with a smirk. “I doubt I’ll actually need to check your diaper by then, potty pants.”
“Mooom!” Briana mock-whined as Veronica left, leaning into Ava with a happy sigh when the other girl scooted close.
“Your mom is pretty great.” Ava’s voice came out more softly than she’d expected. Briana turned her face to listen – putting the two of them in a suddenly intimate position.
“She’s the best.” Briana said quietly, “Do you want to keep playing – or play something else?”
Ava closed her eyes and leaned in. Her lips met the softness of Briana’s mouth, even as she felt the slight squish of the Little girl’s rear on her lap. The kiss was long, setting Ava’s cheeks tingling and her heart thudding. When they finally broke the embrace, Briana’s cheeks were just as pink. She had a lovely, caring yet vulnerable look in her eyes.
“I really like you – and I love playing like this with you.” The little tremble in Briana’s lip as she spoke made Ava’s heart leap.
“We can’t make out here – it’s a public room in your house.” Ava nuzzled Briana’s cheek, pressing their chests together with a shiver of desire. “I like playing like this with you too.”
“That’s okay.” Briana licked her lips and reluctantly slid off Ava’s lap. “It’s too soon in the story for the two princesses to hop in bed together anyway.”
Ava giggled. “Your Little stories are dirty. I never admitted to being a princess anyway.”
“Being Little doesn’t mean I can’t have sex – or love.” Briana touched Ava’s cheek briefly before scooting to her side of the stuffie gathering.
Nobody’s in love with anybody yet. Ava admonished her traitorous heart. We barely know each other, it’s just infatuation. Her heart wasn’t having any of it, having leapt for joy to hear Briana say love. It took reminding herself that Briana had a boyfriend to throw cold water on that party.
“Not everyone plays Little that way,” Ava said cautiously.
“It seems like you do – that’s the second time you’ve kissed me while wearing – while Little.”
Ava grabbed the change of subject like a lifeline – for all that it was something she would have been horrified to discuss an hour ago. “Actually I’m kind of regretting that I didn’t wear at least a pullup.”
“I have tons of them here, and so does Melody. Mom keeps spares for my friends now too. I’m sure we have something that would fit you, if you want one!” Briana was so eager, Ava had an immediate contrary reflex to shoot her down.
That would be mean and pointless. She’s being really nice – not even pushing me about the question she really wanted answered. Ava combed her fingers nervously through her hair before saying, “I’d like that – as long as it was your mom putting it on me. I don’t think I could – well, you said that everyone here changes you, right?”
“Yup!” Briana nodded. “Mom, Dad, both my aunts, Grandma, even the roommates do. It’s okay if you’re not comfortable with the rest of them yet. You were really brave to let Mom help you at my party.”
“Thanks.” Ava squirmed. “I don’t feel brave now though. Could you ask your mom when she comes back?”
“She might not have time for two diapers when she’s getting ready to leave. I could ask her now, if it’s okay with you.” Briana blushed. “Besides, I’m kinda…”
“A potty pants?” Ava laughed.
“So are you!”
“Nuh uh! I can use the potty even if I’m wearing a diaper.”
“Oh yeah? I haven’t seen it yet.” Briana giggled infectiously, Ava joined her friend in laughter and collapsed on the blankets with her. Stuffies were sent flying, including a very indignant Arnold the Pangolin.
“G-go ahead and ask your mom, before I get even less brave than I’m feeling right now.” Ava whispered.
Briana kissed Ava’s cheek and sat up. “Mama! Can you come here for a sec?”
Moments later, Veronica poked a half-made up face into the drawing room. Caught between guilt at interrupting Veronica’s makeup, and not wanting the interruption to be for nothing, Ava winced and fell silent.
“Sweetie, if this is a request for more cookies…”
“I don’t want more cookies.” Briana pouted, putting her hands on her hips when Veronica smirked doubtfully. “This is serious, Mom. Ava wants something but is shy to ask. She wants to know if you’d put a diaper on her. Also – I kind of need a change.”
“Ah, I see.” Veronica knelt next to Ava, squeezing her arm gently. “Feeling left out, Ava-bean?”
“Kind of.” Ava squirmed. “I’m sorry to interrupt you, I should have put one on at home…”
“It’s fine, dear. I’ll be happy to diaper you or change you any time you need it.” She leaned down to kiss Ava’s forehead. “Would you like me to diaper you here on the blanket, or up on the changing table?”
Veronica’s face looked soft and undefined without it’s usual stark black outlines around her eyes and mouth. That softness was all that kept Ava from panicking as she realized what her request was going to entail.
“R-right here? In this room?” Ava bit her lip. “Can’t we um, do it in a bathroom or something?”
“The downstairs bathroom isn’t big enough to lay someone on the floor with the door closed.” Veronica patted Ava’s cheek and rose. “This room does have inset doors that close, however.”
While Veronica closed the doors, Ava tried to still her heartbeat. There was still the question of where she was going to get diapered. On the floor seemed more private and had the advantage of her not having to move – but she’d always wanted to try out a full sized changing table. Sure, they had one at the Green Fairy – and the staff swore that it was always well cleaned – but the idea of using a club changing table was even more ick than a club toilet.
“I’d like to use the changing table, if it’s okay.” Ava climbed carefully to her feet, taking a few unaided steps to the changing table.
“Do you need a boost?” Veronica put her hands on Ava’s hips. “Briana usually does.”
“Yes please.” The table was just above hip height, making it easy to roll onto with Veronica’s help. She glanced over at Briana and rolled her eyes at the Little girl’s excited stare. It seemed too much to ask her friend to leave the room, on top of all the other impositions she was making. The best she could hope for is that Briana would stay on the floor, giving her a bare minimum of privacy.
“Briana, I believe it is very improper for a Cloudland Princess to watch her foreign guest get changed.” Veronica made a turning motion with her index finger. “Turn around and confer with Alanna until we’re done.”
“But there’s nothing to be embarrassed about!” Briana protested, though Ava noticed she was already grabbing her lioness.
“That’s not for you to decide. Turn around now, or you’ll get a spanking and a diaper change. Both of them in front of Ava.”
“Thank you.” Ava whispered, as Briana turned around.
Veronica nodded and put her hands on the waistband of Ava’s jeans. “Would you like me to undress you, or would you rather do it?”
“Can you – take care of me.” Ava crushed Brownie to her chest, blushing furiously. “I mean – take care of it for me.”
“Yes to both, Little bean.” Veronica’s gentle touch had Ava’s jeans undone and off in less time than it took for the Little girl to overcome her bashfulness and nod her thanks.
Everything Veronica did soothed the nervous stiffness that had gripped Ava. From the approving nod she gave to Ava’s alphabet panties, to the way Veronica’s touch was full of platonic care – Ava felt herself relax. Unlike the first change she’d gotten, Ava nodded a yes to the offer of lotion. She was still nervous enough to be ticklish, gigging as Veronica spread the protective layer over her private skin.
Those giggles got her tickled by Veronica. From then on, the diapering was full of caring touches that had Ava yearning to hug the motherly Big. She waited impatiently though a light application of powder and having her diaper tapes set before sitting up and grabbing for Veronica. Though surprised, Veronica hugged back right away with warm strength.
“It looks like Briana’s nighttime diapers fit you well for a daytime option,” Veronica said, laying Ava back on the table. “But your jeans aren’t going back over this. I’m going to put you in one of Briana’s bigger skirts.”
Expertly padded and swathed in rainbow cotton, Ava was delighted to be helped back onto the blankets and into Briana’s excited embrace. Unfortunately, they were immediately separated by Briana being summoned for her own diaper change.
“I’m going to have to finish getting ready quickly,” Veronica said to Briana. “But I promise I’ll say goodbye before I go. Your father and I will be back by dinnertime, and your babysitter should be here any minute.”
“I thought Rosa was going to babysit.” Briana was totally relaxed for her change and playing with Alanna – not that Ava was watching.
“I thought so too, but I should have talked to Rosa about it. She has an extra practice today for the derby game next week.”
Ava frowned as the word babysitter sank in. It seemed like a good idea, she was way to Little to be in charge in her current state, though it would be tricky if she needed a change before Veronica got home. She tried to think of who might be babysitting – family members seemed to be out, she doubted that Veronica would refer to them as a babysitter. Maybe it would be the cool theatre girl Ava had briefly met at the birthday party. She seemed fun, and was one of Briana’s roommates, if Ava was remembering correctly.
A deep male voice sounded clearly from the living room in the quiet house. “Hi everyone!”
“Good to see you, Gary.” Rosa’s voice was more muted, but was nevertheless easily recognizable.
Ava’s heart and belly plunged into freefall. Gary’s the babysitter? BOYFRIEND Gary? She clutched Brownie in a desperate attempt to keep her discomfort from becoming a panic. Surely, as empathetic as she was, Vernoica would notice how upset she was and…
“There you go, BabyBee.” Veronica sat Briana on the floor in her fresh diaper and turned distractedly to the door. “Let me say hi to Gary, and then please ask him if you need something, I’ve got to finish getting ready.”
Abandoned by Veronica, Ava turned to Briana, but her friend only had eyes for the door, already calling out, “Gary!” in an excited tone. Ava couldn’t remember the exact conversation she’d had with Briana about Gary babysitting, but she didn’t think she’d said yes to it. After so much playing – and the super loving diaper change she’d gotten – hopping out of Littlespace wasn’t an option. It wasn’t even something she considered and rejected, she was a Little girl stuck in a classic nightmare. A babysitter had suddenly appeared, and they were scary!
No, no no no! This can’t be happening. I don’t want a babysitter! Why does Veronica have to go to her stupid meeting? Where’s Briana’s Grandma? Why won’t anybody notice how scared I am?