Jenny watched her wall, where branch-dappled sunlight danced in time with the spring breeze. Despite her worries of being rejected by Brooke when she was Little, everything had gone well, even up to wetting her diaper. Navi had that diaper off her and was wrapping her in a fresh one, while Jenny used her passivity and her fiancé’s loving touch to sink further into Littlespace. When did being gathered into Navi’s arms, wearing just a diaper, become one of my favorite feelings? Jenny’s Little mind was vaguely interested in an answer to that question, but found cuddling up to Navi to be the top priority.
“Navi, can we have ice cream and cookies?” Jenny looked up into Navi’s smiling face and hastily added, “And whipped cream? Real whipped cream, please?”
“That’s a lot of sugar.” Navi chuckled. “Maybe we should scale that back a little.”
“But I have a friend over!” Jenny was prepared to cry some crocodile tears – as part of teasing Navi – only to find real tears in her eyes. A wave of frustration had come out of nowhere, it wasn’t fair to not be able to have a bunch of sugar with her best friend.
“Woah, somebody’s getting really Little, are you okay?” Navi caressed Jenny’s cheek, rubbing a tear trail away with her thumb.
“No.” Jenny pouted. “I need cookies. And Ice cream. And…”
“And whipped cream, I heard.” Navi laughed again, blazing golden in Jenny’s minds-eye as she picked up the Little girl and whirled her around. “You win. You know, I’m much more strict with the Littles I babysit for.”
“I bet you don’t spin them around like that either.” Jenny giggled. “Like I was spinning Bowser around.”
“You bet I don’t.” Navi pulled a kitty t-shirt over Jenny’s head, following it up with a denim shortall dress that barely covered her diaper. “Ready to see how Brooke’s doing with her first diaper?”
“Yeah!” Jenny held her arms out to Navi.
“Are you going to demand to be carried everywhere today?” Despite her protest, Navi had Jenny in her arms before she’d finished talking.
“Of course. It’s snugglier this way.” Cuddling up to Navi earned Jenny a squeeze and a diaper pat, both of which warmed her heart as much as being pressed up against Navi warmed her body. Downstairs, Brooke was standing awkwardly next to Clarissa, wearing the same cute skirt and top – with a bit more poof in her rear.
“Look at you two, getting ready so fast.” Navi grinned and set Jenny down – all the way down to the floor, to which Jenny happily leaned against Navi’s leg.
“I didn’t have to change this one – yet.” Clarissa winked at Brooke, who blushed to the tips of her ears.
“Is that something I’m expected to do?”
“Yep, and not just wet but…”
“Lyssa, be nice.” Navi put a thumb on Clarissa’s lips. “The real answer, Brooke, is that you’re not expected to use it, but you’re welcome to if you want.”
“I don’t think I will – but if I did, you totally don’t have to change me. I’ll take care of myself.”
“Brooke.” Jenny patted her friend’s leg. “I wanna see.”
“O-okay but, I don’t think I’m brave enough to walk around in just the diaper so – I’m gonna flash you.” Brooke pulled skater skirt up, turning around and bending over to show off the teddy-bear print on her diaper before dropping her skirt.
Rolling her eyes at Brooke’s bashful behavior made Jenny remember how freaked out she’d been by the thought of anyone seeing her in a pullup – let alone a diaper. It was a strange thought to remember, clashing as hard as it did with her current mindset. Little time and diapers just go together, Jenny thought. So all Brooke has to do is get Little and she’ll be fine.
“Do you want to play more ponies?” To Jenny’s surprise, her question elicited a grimace from Brooke.
“I think I’m all ponied out, sorry hon.” Brooke shrugged. “Is there something else you want to play?”
“Oh! The cookies!” Jenny looked up at Navi in shock. “We almost forgot about the ice cream and everything.”
“You almost forgot.” Navi said with an infuriating smirk. “I was waiting to see if you’d remember.”
“That’s terrible! Just for that, you have to make us a double-batch of whipped cream.”
“This sounds decedent – I’m in.” Brooke grinned. “Especially if the ice cream is chocolate.”
“It is now.” Jenny declared.
“You’re lucky we have some chocolate ice cream, I’m not driving to the store for this sugar rush.” Navi picked Jenny up and transported her to the kitchen, setting her down in a chair. Brooke sat at Jenny’s right, while Clarissa drifted after Navi to help with the treats.
“Where’s Usha and Wachel? Where’s Bowser?”
“I don’t know where you girlfriends are, but Bowser is passed out.” Brook giggled. “Not only is he snoring, but his little legs aren’t even twitching. We won’t see him for a good hour or two.”
“Rachel and Niusha had a hiking date for this afternoon, remember?” Navi sliced a tube of cookie dough expertly, laying the discs on a greased baking tray.
“Oh, right.” Jenny chewed on her lip, unsure why she was feeling out of sorts. The afternoon felt like less of an event than it had before, with nothing really planned besides hanging out. “What do you want to do after we have cookies? Oh, or we could watch a movie during the cookies.”
“A kids’ movie?” Brooke teased.
“It’ll help you get in the spirit, maybe.” Jenny was relieved to see Brooke nod.
“I haven’t seen the one about the unicorn princess yet.”
“Oh, the one that falls in love with the dragon princess? Me either! Let’s get it started while we wait for the cookies to bake.”
Brooke got up, turned to Jenny expectantly, then raised her brows curiously. “What are you waiting for?”
“Navi has to carry me,” Jenny said, smiling in a dreamy haze.
“Oh no she doesn’t, come on, bozo.” Brooke grabbed Jenny’s hand and dragged her out of her seat, laughing. The two of them stumbled into the living room, where Jenny tripped on one of the scattered ponies and sent them both tumbling to the floor. Luckily, the blanket they’d been playing ponies on caught their fall, though with hardwood underneath, both girls had the breath knocked out of them.
“We should clean these up.” Brooke started tossing ponies into the bin without regard for which ponies were friends, or their pony-feelings.
“Careful.” Jenny picked up her favorite trio and set them carefully in the bin.
“Uh, sorry.” Brooke rubbed her neck awkwardly. They packed up the rest of the ponies in a strained silence, which thankfully gave way to good-natured banter as Brooke back-seated Jenny on the best way to find the movie they wanted to watch. By the time the oven was pre-heated and the cream whipped, the movie’s opening credits were rolling. Without thinking about it, Jenny cuddled up to Brooke, flipping a free expanse of blanket over the two of them.
“This is nice, I like you being Little even more, now.” Brooke put an arm around Jenny. “We haven’t cuddled since… middle school?”
“Did you miss it?”
“Maybe? I got weird about being overly touchy around the same time you did.” Brooke sighed, leaning her head against Jenny. “Yeah, I definitely missed it.”
The movie’s opening scene flashed by unnoticed by Jenny as she thought back to her transition between middle school and high school when it’d been fine for friends to hug – but not to outright cuddle. It was nice that she’d been a girl – the boys had gotten really stand-offish with each other, it seemed like they’d only touched each other when they were punching or wrestling. It’s sad that I’ll have to stop cuddling when I grow up, Jenny cuddled closer to Brooke, then frowned. Wait – I am grown up, aren’t I? This is weird, but nice. The sudden appearance of a butterfly-sorceress pulled Jenny out of her thoughts and left her blinking with confusion at the screen.
“Who’s the butterfly lady?”
“She’s Mariposa – they literally just introduced her in the opening scene.” Brooke nudged Jenny.
“Oh, I missed it. What’s her deal?”
“Are you going to ask me questions the whole movie?”
“Sorry – don’t be mad.” Jenny bit her lip and ducked her head.
“I’m not – Jenna – Jenny, sorry, I forgot you were all Little.” Brooke bonked her head against Jenny’s by way of apology. “Do you want to start over from the movie’s introduction?”
“Yeah, if that’s okay.”
“It’s fine.” Brooke wound the movie back, in time for ridiculous bowls mounded with ice-cream and ringed with cookies to arrive. A wealth of whipped cream mounded up over the ice cream, almost spilling out of the bowl around the gaps in the cookies. “Woah, th-thanks.”
“Thanks Navi!” Jenny scooped up a chunk of ice-cream with a cookie, getting as much whipped cream as she could, and shoved the whole mess in her mouth. Creamy chocolate sweetness combined with crunchy cookie and airy whipped cream to make a happiness volcano erupt in Jenny’s brain. Brooke was eating a lot more sedately, even gingerly. If her slow eating was part of a strategy to have lots of her treat left when Jenny’s was gone – that was sneakiness worthy of Jenny’s bestie.
A sugar rush wasn’t particularly conducive to following a movie’s plot, and Jenny didn’t want to upset Brooke again by asking questions. Happily, one thing a sugar rush was good for was enjoying the pretty colors and fantastic characters without much concern for why they were doing magic stuff. As the end credits rolled, the final musical number gave Jenny an appropriate swell of emotion – even if she wasn’t sure what was being celebrated.
Brooke squirmed when Jenny hugged her. “Woah, you are sticky. Did you get any of that ice cream inside you?”
“Oh, sorry! More than you did!” Jenny pointed at Brooke’s abandoned bowl, which had devolved into a soggy cream and cookie mush.
“It was a lot of sugar.” Brooke shrugged. Something was off, Jenny furrowed her brow at her friend. Her bestie didn’t seem to be having a good time at all. From her posture to her expression, Brooke seemed – downright uneasy.
“Do you have to potty?” Jenny whispered. “You look uncomfortable.”
“Um – yes. But that’s not really why I’m…” Brooke sighed, gently disengaging from Jenny. “I’m just not getting into the whole Little thing like you are.”
“Oh.” Jenny’s stomach dropped, fear flooding into the void it left behind. “I – I’m sorry if it was weird…”
“No, hon, you’re still super cute.” Brooke shrugged. “I’m a little bummed, I thought I’d be able to follow your lead. You’re not upset that I couldn’t, are you?”
“No! Not at all, it’s okay if you couldn’t.” Except that it wasn’t okay at all. The last time an emotional distance had opened up between Brooke and Jenny – Jenna – was so long ago she couldn’t remember what had happened, except that it’d been a time of icky feelings. Now those feelings were back – even Bowser lapping at Jenny’s sticky-sweet hands couldn’t cheer her up.
“Jenny, seriously, I had a good time today – I’d be up for doing it again sometime.” Brooke stretched. “I think I am going to take off though, I need to walk Bowser.”
“I could come with – uh…” Jenny looked down at her outfit. Even in the throes of Littlespace, walking around in her shortall dress and poofy diaper was out of the question. Worse, she realized that Brooke hadn’t really invited her along to walk the puppy – and might not have intended to at all. “I guess I better not, dressed like this. Thanks for coming over, and bringing the puppy, and – playing with me.”
“I had fun, honestly. Pinkie promise.” Brooke didn’t hold out her pinkie for the promise, prompting another stomach drop for Jenny.
“Okay.” Jenny gave her friend the brightest smile she could manage. “We can talk about another time – um – later, if you want. Thanks for coming – yeah.”
Brooke gave Jenny a hug warm enough to forestall actual tears for the Little girl, gathered up her puppy, and said her goodbyes to Navi and Clarissa. She was out the door without even changing out of her diaper – which was either a sign of her wanting to be gone fast, or being comfortable wearing a diaper. The see-saw uncertainty of those possibilities had Jenny’s eyes hot and scratchy, and her nose feeling like it’d been bonked.
“Are you okay, Jenny-bear?” Navi picking Jenny up was exactly what she needed, the Little girl threw herself into her fiancé’s arms, clinging to her tightly.
“Brooke ran out of here. I don’t think she had a good time.”
“I don’t think that’s true.” Clarissa patted Jenny on the back. “She was having fun right through her diaper change and after. I think she got frustrated at the end – she said herself she was bummed she couldn’t be Little with you.”
“What if it’s my fault she had a bad time at the end?” Jenny knew her voice was muffled from pressing her face into Navi’s shoulder – and simply hoped her caregivers would be able to understand anyway. Pulling away from Navi wasn’t an option. “What if she’s never able to be Little? What if she decided she didn’t like me being Little after a while, and I can never be Little around her again?”
“My goodness, that’s a lot of catastrophes.” Navi bounced Jenny lightly on her knee, stroking the Little girl’s hair. “I’d almost think there was some other reason for your mood to drop – like you’re having a sugar crash.”
“That’s not it! My feelings are real.” Jenny squirmed, slapping a petite fist against Navi’s collarbone.
“She didn’t say they aren’t real, sweetie.” Clarissa caught Jenny’s hand and held it. “Just that there might be a reason for them that’s food based instead of friend based.”
“Brooke didn’t look as upset to me as you seem to think she is,” Navi said soothingly. “You know her better than I do, but if your mood was crashing anyway, maybe you read more negative into her than was really there. We’ll find out later, when you two talk.”
“I – I guess. She wouldn’t be so mad that we can’t talk anymore – right?”
“Jenny, girl, no.” Clarissa leaned over to hug-squish Jenny against Navi. “She for sure wasn’t that kind of mad. I think you’re spiraling a little.”
“You know what you need, Jenny-bear?” Navi asked.
“What?” Jenny managed to peel her face away from Navi’s chest to peer up at her fiancé.
“An orgasm, a diaper change, and a nap, in that order.”
“Navi!” Jenny ducked away from Clarissa, pressing her face against Navi’s side, keeping her fiancé’s substantial bosom between her and her new girlfriend.
“Why so shy? You told me you were fantasizing about orgasms with Clarissa.” Navi’s voice was unbearably sly.
“Navi!”
“Ooh, hot.” Clarissa chuckled. “It looks like she needs you today, Monchi. I’ll collect those kisses we were talking about earlier another time, okay Jenny?”
In an act of heroic bravery, Jenny peeked over Navi’s cleavage at Clarissa. “O-okay.”
“There’s my girl, feeling better?” Navi brushed Jenny’s hair away from her face, smiling when the Little girl nodded. “Let’s get you the rest of the way. You just need to do one thing for me before I start my Jenny-mood-cure.”
“What’s that?” Jenny put her arms around Navi’s neck, as her fiancé gathered her in her arms and stood.
“Wet your diaper. It’s going to make the vibrator a lot more fun.”
“I – I’m doing that a lot lately. Is it really – is it okay?”
“Of course, baby girl.” Navi cradled Jenny against her chest.
“Sure it is. It’s more than okay, if it’s something you want to do.” Clarissa hopped up and kissed each of the other girls on the cheek. “I’m going to go for a jog. You two have fun.”
Jenny waved listlessly to Clarissa. As Navi carried her upstairs, she thought about using her diaper, until she realized that with her legs wrapped around her caregiver, Navi would probably feel something if she did. Heat, possibly, or at least the feel of the padding expanding seemed to be the most likely signifiers, it was too transgressive a thing to not leave some kind of sign.
“You’re awfully quiet, J-Bear, what’s going on in my Little girl’s head?”
“I have to potty.”
“Do you not want to use your diaper?”
“No I – it’s that we’re – I’m straddling you and – and…”
Navi laughed, squeezing Jenny tightly enough that her decision to wet her diaper or not was nearly moot. “Hon, if it bothers you, you don’t have to do it. But I’ve had Littles use their diapers while I’m holding them more times than I can count. Heck, I’ve been peed on directly, more than once.”
“That’s gross! Those Littles are gross – the ones that peed on you.” Jenny sighed. “Navi, do you really like doing this with me? I feel like I’m hot and cold on it all the time. Sometimes I want to be super Little, but it took me forever to use my diaper, and I’m still weird about it.”
“You’re not weird about it. You’re my Jenny, and I absolutely love your Little side.” Navi nudged Jenny’s cheek until she had the Little girl’s face in position for a kiss, bringing their lips together with aching sweetness. “I didn’t think I could fall in love with you more until I saw you Little – and then I did. Hard, just like I did the first time I fell in love with you.”
“Navi…” Jenny whined, overstuffed with emotion that had no place to go. She found her release valve in biting Navi’s shoulder.
“I know, sweetie. I feel bitey-love for you all the time too. It seems like you go back and forth a lot about using your diapers – do you want to change that one way or another? It’s fine if how you feel about it depends on the day.”
“There’s always a weird interruption to the game when I can’t just – do stuff I’ve done before.” Jenny sighed.
“Would it help if you were told to do it?” Navi kissed Jenny on the cheek. “Use your diaper for me, Jenny-bear. Get those pants wet so I can fill them with sexy buzzies.”
“Navi…” Jenny whined, and tried to relax. It felt like the world hung in suspended time while she concentrated – or tried not to concentrate – or whatever Jenny thought would help. When the dam broke, mentally and physically, Jenny trembled all over. She was wetting herself with her crotch pressed right up against her fiancé, her Navi, her Monchi. Shame, relief, uncertainty – and arousal – hit Jenny like ocean surf against a rock.
“Good girl.” Navi’s lips found Jenny, parting them and pulling her into a long, tongue-tangling kiss that left them gasping. They sat on the bed – well, Navi did, Jenny was in Navi’s lap. A purple silicone bullet slipped down the front of Jenny’s diaper – carefully nudged into place by Navi’s strong fingers.
Pinpoint vibration rocked Jenny’s button – while secondary waves spread out from her wet padding to thrum against her kitty as a whole. Her plans to reciprocate for Navi went out the window as she became an incoherent, moaning mess of a Little with only two actions – humping Navi’s leg and running her hands over her caregiver’s body. Waves of pleasure threw Jenny’s back into a tight arch, her chest heaving – each wave erased a bad or conflicted feeling. Guilt, sadness, frustration, embarrassment, fear – one by one they dissolved until Jenny was free and floating on clouds of bliss.
Her diaper change at Navi’s hands was felt only as soft touches without any context of continuity. The only solid things in the world were Navi’s gentle voice and the comforting fluff of Elizabat in her arms. Jenny cuddled in Navi’s arms for a while before she realized her fresh diaper was all taped up and done.
“Navi – what if Brooke can never be Little?”
“I don’t think that’ll happen – she was showing signs in the beginning – it took you a while at first too, remember?”
“But what if…”
“Then it’ll be okay. She’ll still love you, and so will I and the rest of our girlfriends.”
“I – I know that.” Jenny sighed, nuzzling Navi’s arm. “It’s just – I was thinking that maybe – maybe it would be fun to play with another Little. Like – on a job with you. If you have a client that you think would be good.”
“I can think of a couple that you’d get along with well.” Navi pulled Jenny atop her, peppering the Little girl with gentle kisses. “If you still want to do that when you wake up from your nap, we’ll look at my schedule and pick a good day, okay?”
“I think I will.” Jenny kissed Navi’s neck, feeling her fiancé’s pulse quicken under her lips. “But before we do that, after my nap, I want to be a big girl with you – and make you feel good.”
“Mmm, how fast can you nap?”
Jenny giggled. “Don’t get me worked up, I’ll…” a yawn stretched Jenny’s jaw. “I won’t be able to fall asleep.”
“Uh huh. I think you’ll be fine.” Navi pulled a blanket over Jenny. “Lay your head down, J-Bear.”
“That’s a silly nickname.” Jenny yawned again. “You’re silly.” If Navi had a response, the Little girl didn’t remember it. Sleep dropped like a theatre curtain, while Jenny basked in the love and safety she could feel radiating from her fiancé.