Giving Veronica her schedule was a load off. Getting a lunch packed by Erin was amazing. She found herself enjoying her labs in a way she hadn’t been able to for months. Even the most annoying of the other grad students couldn’t get under her skin. Casey checking in by text to make sure she was getting home okay was a little weird. It did provide a nice feeling of security though. She’d always envied the girls in undergrad who’d had a parent they could call to make their walk home a little safer.
She checked back in with Veronica when she got home. When Veronica praised her for doing a good job at school Briana nearly cried again. Being released from the responsibility of homework for the evening was a surprising weight off. Jane enlisted her to help with dinner, which turned into a silly catch up session on each other’s lives. Suzie took over her evening, and the two of them cackled at a terrible horror movie.
By the time Erin came to collect Briana to send her to bed, she was glowing. She realized she’d been avoiding everyone, too worried about the rent and food to enjoy her friends. Everyone had been imposing on her all day. Far from being stifled, she felt as free as she’d ever been. Erin set out a pair of teddy bear pullups for her, and even that made putting them on easier to swallow. It was less than ten minutes from her head hitting the pillow to blissful sleep.
The next morning she woke to Erin’s gentle voice. “Good morning Briana. Time to get up.”
“Ugh, what time is it?” Briana whined in protest. It felt early, way too early.
“Time to get up. Come on, let’s get your vitals.”
Briana sat up with a great groan, obediently presenting her arm for Erin to check her blood pressure. “Isn’t it bad to do this so early?”
“Actually, one of the best times to take someone’s BP is right after they’ve woken up and urinated.” Erin said. “Or in your case, urinated and woken up.”
Briana blushed slowly as she processed the sentence. Now that she was paying attention, she could feel the bloated pullup on her rear, as full as yesterday. Erin took Briana’s hand and led her to Veronica’s office. Briana blinked sleepily at Veronica.
“Is she wet?” Veronica asked.
“Yeah, looks about the same as yesterday.” Erin pulled Briana’s pajama pants down, eliciting a squeak from Briana.
“I see.” Veronica said, looking the sodden pullup over. Briana’s face flamed again, the embarrassment was waking her up and making her want to crawl under the covers at the same time. “Go ahead and sit down, Briana.”
“I’ll get the chair wet again.” Briana protested.
“Briana.” Veronica looked up into Briana’s eyes. “Sit please.”
Briana pouted and sat. The sun was barely up, it was way too early to be awake, especially on a Saturday.
“Now, how do you feel this morning?”
“Sleepy.” Briana said sourly.
“And a little bratty too?” Veronica smirked. “That’s a good sign actually. It means you’re letting go a little, letting yourself be vulnerable.”
“Not that it helped.” Briana sighed, pointing to her crotch.
“You have to expect that this won’t help right away. In fact, it will quite likely get worse before it gets better.”
“Worse? What worse could happen than waking up wet every morning?” Briana gave Veronica a horrified look.
“You may see other symptoms.” Veronica said. “You’ve been under a lot of stress for more than a month, and never really had a solid foundation before that. I want you to know that that’s natural, and it doesn’t mean you should give up. You’ve had months of the problem, and only a day of the cure.”
“Potential cure.” Briana said.
“Yes, but it’s the one we’ve got right now so let’s give it a shot.” Veronica said crisply.
“I wish you could hypnotize me and fix it that way.” Briana pouted.
“That doesn’t really work. I do know how to hypnotize people though, it’s a good party trick. We can do that if you want when it’s my turn to watch you in the evening.”
The end of Veronica’s last sentence was breathtakingly infantilizing. Briana swallowed nervously and squirmed in her pullup. A little puddle collected on the seat under her, but she couldn’t make herself stop.
“Let’s finish off the morning evaluation.” Veronica said. “You’re fidgeting a lot, which you also did yesterday. Are you uncomfortable in the pullup? Is it painful in any way?”
“It’s embarrassing.” Briana ducked her head, feeling a fresh wave of shame.
“But physically it doesn’t bother you much.” Veronica said. “You’ve felt embarrassed every morning that you woke up wet?”
“She doesn’t have to say it like I’m a baby.” Briana stared straight down at her thighs. “Yes, of course.”
“What’s important is that kind of embarrassment is strong negative feedback. Your subconscious is trying to get something that feels important enough to bring on that much embarrassment.” Veronica lifted Briana’s chin. “How did you feel yesterday, with everyone taking some responsibility for you? We were very invasive.”
“It was really nice.” Briana whispered. “I was really happy.”
“Are you worried that we’ll stop doing that if you stop waking up wet?” Veronica asked.
That idea hadn’t even occurred to Briana. The thought shot a spike of ice into her chest.
“Oh, I’m sorry sweetheart.” Veronica said, stroking Briana’s cheek. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I want to reassure you that we’ll help you for as long as you need.”
Briana nodded, her heart still pounding. Already feeling vulnerable freed her to shamelessly lean her cheek against Veronica’s hand.
“Do you want to sit on my lap again?” Veronica asked.
“Oh uh, that’s okay. I’ll get your dress all wet.” Briana smiled sadly. “I’ll clean the chair when we’re done.”
“I have a lot of these plain black dresses.” Veronica said, smoothing out her skirt and patting her lap. “Come here sweetie.”
Hesitantly, Briana stood. She sidled close to Veronica, giving her a chance to see the glistening wet surface of the pullup and the little puddle on the chair. She melted into Veronica when she was pulled close anyway, tucking her head into Veronica’s neck.
“There’s a good girl.” Veronica’ stroked Briana’s back. The touch didn’t dredge up sadness for Briana this time. It was comforting. She wrapped her arms around her roommate and closed her eyes. “One more question and we’ll get started on the day. Why did you pick the styled pullups instead of the plain ones?”
“They were prettier.” Briana said softly. She lay against Veronica, half dozing, enjoying the other woman’s warmth while Veronica entered her notes.
“Okay, let’s talk about the schedule for today. You have homework to do, and a few chores.”
“Homework?” Briana sat up and pouted. “But I usually do it on Sunday. There’s not that much.”
“All the better reason to get it done today, so you can enjoy your afternoon and all of Sunday.”
Briana rolled her eyes. “Not everyone is type-A like you.”
“Attitude, young lady.” Veronica tapped Briana on the nose. “You do get a choice, chores first or homework first.”
“What’s the chore?” Briana yawned.
“Sweeping the floors downstairs, and cleaning the kitchen surfaces.”
“I’ll do that first.”
“Alright. Erin is making breakfast for you, so get cleaned up and dressed. When you’re done with breakfast, Jane will get you started on your chores. After all that, come back up to my office.”
“I have to do my homework here?” Briana asked, surprised.
“You have to check in with me at least.” Veronica said. “I can see you really don’t want to do your homework this morning.”
“Yes Veronica.” Briana pouted.
“What a dramatic pout.” Veronica kissed Briana tenderly on the cheek. “And how do you feel right now?”
Briana looked down at the floor with a secretive smile. “Safe.”
“Good girl. Off you go, you’re wiffy, and not only from the pullup.” Veronica gave Briana’s rear a gentle swat.
Giggling, Briana scampered off to her room.